Pray For Nepal

Heard about the Nepal earthquake today and feel sad for the casualties. The quake even affect those in India, Bhutan and Tibet and also coincidentally, these are the few places I had a chance to visit three years back.

When I looked at the photos of the demolished UNESCO heritage in Kathmandu, my heart sank. I quite like Kathmandu honestly and its quirky traits and now most of the buildings were in rubble. My prayer goes to the people of Nepal and not forgetting those who are affected by the earthquake. I will forever treasure the memories and the good times I had when I was in Kathmandu 3 years back.

Not so Happy Chinese New Year

It's the start of the goat year but frankly speaking, I don't have much hope or looking forward to the year. Been having many personal and career wise problems around until I wish I could just run away. Suffocating best describe what I am going through right now.

A lot of personal stuff going on around my life right now. Start of something I dreaded but glad that at least he is free of problem. I would rather I have the problem so that one day if I fail, he still can find another one to fulfill his wish. I do not know how long or how much can I take before this day comes.

From Nothing to Too Many Trips

Gosh.. I just finished booking another 2 trips in less than a week. From initially no travel plans for the rest of the year to four travel plans in the next half of the year and not forgetting two musicals in July and Dec this year.

I will be flying off to Singapore for the Raya holidays and for the Sound of Music broadway show which cost me a bomb! Paying in sing dollar is no fun especially the exchange rate is 2.5 times. Sigh, what to do..there is hardly any nice musical/broadway/west end show in Malaysia besides the Mamma Mia musical in December which this time I going with my parents. Watched it once in New York and I love it, especially I can sing along to all the ABBA songs plus it is also the first musical I watched with my husband as a couple.

Come August /September will be a surprise trip to somewhere over the seas with sun, sea and food (cannot not have food in the itinerary especially if I am bringing my husband for his surprise birthday getaway)

And in October, another trip to Japan and this time to Tokyo with my buddies. Can't wait for the onsen and ryokan experience and getting naked for the public bath in Hakone.

And finally, just booked a trip to Yogyakarta end November for Borobodur.

Excited !

Laziness Creeping Back In Again

Sigh..my motivation to write at least once a week gone down the drain again. Fact is I have been quite lazy to write much these days plus I always think that no one actually read my blog, haha. And my life doesn't have much things to write about and I have not been to much places since Japan in April. Yes, I have yet to finish blogging the trip and many trips eons ago and I don't really want to dwell much in the stress in life that I am having now. Plus, after my favourite TVB dramas end last few week, I don't have much dramas to look forward at night. So, I guess it's time to bring back the blogging mojo and not forgetting the 5 photobook vouchers that I need to finish by October!

Sad things aside, happy stuff is that I will be going to Japan again in October, this time to Tokyo with my BFFs and I am dying to try out the ryokan style accomodation and onsen (hot spring bath) that I missed out last time. And also visiting Hakone for the Mt Fuji view and not forgetting lots of shopping and luggage allowance this time. I learnt my lesson the previous trip. Now I am going into Japan full force, haha.

Before that, Singapore for The Sound of Music musical from West End.

Random Updates

I guess my blog is dying slowly. Haven't got the time to properly sit down and jotting down my thoughts on my travel and yet in a month's time, I will be going to Japan for the Sakura viewing. It's something I have been looking forward since I knew the existence of Sakura and it's something that I need to do for myself. Truth is, the past few months had been very tough mostly due to personal relationship issues. I went through emotional rollercoaster for several weeks and months since beginning of the year up to the extent that I regretted some of the decisions I made over the last two years. It's a shocker for someone like me, who doesn't regret much things/events that happened in my life. I am more like the person who regret not buying that shoe than regret buying. And now coupled with haze, water rationing and missing plane, I came to realise that life indeed is short and unpredictable. In fact, I have been living according to the expectations and want from people around me up to a point I realised I wasn't happy anymore. If I were to die tomorrow, I hope I would not have regrets in my life.

Sakura

Very random updates. 

I m too lazy to write or post any photos currently as it's only 2 days away from my long awaited holiday to the land of Lord of the Rings. Yup, I am actually flying off the New Zealand on my birthday, so that is considered my best birthday gift for myself. Just dread the long transit hours in Melbourne though. Gotta camp at the airport for 6 hours in the wee hours of the morning. Looks like I need to 'borrow' pillows and blankets from the plane. 

Anyway I have booked for a trip to Kyoto next April to see the Sakura. This is something I have been dreaming since the last time I stumbled into a blog which was spammed with millions of Sakura photos. It's weird that this trip was booked within less than half and hour of discussion with the hubs and he actually agree to go! Wow! And settled all the accommodation in Osaka and Kyoto as well. Just a lil sad that I am not able to get a decent ryokan with decent price even for a night. Well, the sakura that matters the most!

Silent Blogger again!

Sigh, in a blink of eye, a month had passed since I last blogged. Again, I had fallen into the silent blogger trap. Not that I have nothing to blog, but I just could not find the time and energy to do it. The past few weeks were spend doing photobooks for two of my trips, Tibet and Bhutan and another one for my brother's wedding guest book. It was last weekend and I was majorly involved in the preparation of the wedding from decoration to running around like mad woman trying to solve problems, haha. Now that it's over, and trips to look forward in the next few months, maybe I can find my blogging mojo back again.

Dream Home

I was reading about this blogger's entry about her dream home, something she had been planning and dreamt of, for the past few years. Reading her thoughts and looking through her photos brought back good 'ol memories of my own dream home, not my current home but my condo that I bought few years back.

I still remember the first moment I set my eyes on my condo, I fall in love. I could already envision how the fully furnished place would turn out to be. When I paid for the deposit, I was nervous but excited at the same time. Finally, I can moved into a place I called home and not renting rooms anymore. Yes, I have been renting rooms for the last 5-6 years while working hard to save the money to get my first home.

Eventhough I was tired from searching and researching for contractors, designers, ploughing through ID magazines and websites, I was nevertheless happy. Happy that I can decorate my own home, happy I can make decisions on what colour to paint, what furniture to buy, what electronics to get and etc. The end result, my home turned out exactly how I visioned it to be, white and grey minimalist with a tinge of colour in the bedrooms, gigantic wardrobe to fit all my clothes, the bar at the dry kitchen that I always wanted and most important a huge conceal shoe cabinet to fit all my shoes.

Sadly, I only spend a year there before I had to moved out. Still go back once in while to search the feel of my dream home. Could never let myself to rent it out or sell it,  how can I ever sell my dream home. I had moved a new home and a new life. Many people will tell me that I am lucky to move to a landed property but many things/decisions in my new home are beyond my control or things that I hated are there. Sadly, I could never feel the new home as my dream home.

Happy Chinese New Year

It's my first year of celebrating CNY at my husband's place and first time giving out ang pow. So how do I feel about it? Truthfully, I missed having reunion dinner with my parents. For the past 30 years, my CNY reunion is just between the 5 of us but this year, I had a huge reunion dinner. Maybe for other people, they will think, that's good, but I missed the quietness and the walk around my Seremban home on new year's eve.

And 2nd day of CNY is the day I looked forward to as I get to go home!

May the snake year bring me more luck and happiness as compare to the dragon year.

In Loving Memory

Jia Jia,

Farewell and goodbye.

I regretted did not spend much time with you.

I regretted that hubby didn't get to know you much.

I will miss you very very much!

CNY this year won't be the same without you.

May you rest in peace.

From you beloved granddaughter, Jing Jing....

Wedding SDE

Ronny + Jing Yi SDE (1080p) from JY Wong on Vimeo.


Snippets from my wedding that I can't stop viewing, haha. 

Should I Continue?

Should I continue writing here? I have lost motivation to write on my travel adventure knowing that I would not have much chance to travel anymore. I think I kind of losing myself as a person, the person I used to know no longer resides in me anymore and sometimes I feel like a maid. Everyone dictates how I should live my life, have I lost the fire and the happy go lucky personality I used to have?

2012 in Review

2012 has passed, I wouldn't use the word flew by as I was struggling from the beginning till the end of the year. A lot of people say, dragon year will be a good year for prosperity and wealth, well at least for me it wasn't. There are many ups and downs throughout 2012, which probably the only good one is me being married.

Career wise, looking back at 2012, the year started off rather badly as I totally lost motivation for work or career advancement in my department. Got a very bad review for my first leading assignment and not forgetting my report was being photocopied as case study to every manager in the department. And because of that, my career took a huge plunge from the high flyer to the low profile. I thought I had a second chance when I almost nailed the transfer. Again, the opportunity was lost, not because I didn't do well but somehow somewhere someone intervene. As at 2013, I would not say I hate my job, but it's almost close to hatred and I have lost respect for what I do. I am no longer an auditor but a fault finder.


Love and relationship wise, 2012 is probably the best as I am married but it also signify a huge transition for me.  I am happy to have found and marry him and I know I married a good man. I know he can give me comfort, security and love but somehow in the tiny corner of my heart, I miss being single. I miss the freedom I used to have, the rush of excitement to just jet off to some foreign country for the weekend but above the rest I miss my dream house, my condo. I know to make a marriage works, it takes a lot of effort and I am trying my very best to be a good wife, daughter and daughter-in-law. And please, do not ask me when I am going to have kids. I just had my wedding barely two months and everyone asking me that. Please give me a break. I can't barely breathe or have enough sleep these days.

Emotions wise, it's probably one of the worst. It feels like my emotions are forever in a roller coaster ride, from being excited of being proposed to depression. Yes, as much as I didn't want to admit it, I had quite a severe depression during the middle of the year. I cried almost everyday for 2 months and had to use tonnes of concealer to conceal my swollen eyes. Not because of wedding preparation but other stuff that I didn't want to disclose here. Even at one point of time I contemplate of just crashing my car into the divider so that I can stay in hospital and not depressed over all these. I don't know how I get through these times, but luckily I didn't crash my car or else there will be a huge hole in my pocket now. 

On a happy note, I managed to travel quite a bit this year, to New York, Puerto Rico and Bali for honeymoon and not forgetting conquering Mount Kinabalu. Ran another 10km during the Adidas King of the Road. I guess much of the things that make me happy are through travelling, photography and running.

So what's in store for 2013?
I am longing for an adventure in Mongolia and more travel and photography opportunities but at the moment, I am just craving for more sleep and no housework. 

Long Overdue Updates

I did a check on my last post and oh my..it was like almost a month ago. Things had been very hectic for the past month with my weekends were fully booked for wedding stuff, buying stuff for the house and getting myself the tittle Mrs just last weekend.

Yup, I am officially no longer Ms.Wong. Colleagues and friends asked me how I feel, but honestly, the feeling have not really sink in.

Anyway, the next few weeks will be extremely busy as I have a final fitting for my wedding gown, confirming on the guest list and the photos from the bridal house, guo dai lai and many more. Not sure I will have the time and energy to keep updating this blog.

Oh btw, I had the most amazing hens night ever, organised by the best ever bunch of chickas and yup I am the mother hen, I guess, haha. Wearing a sash with the word Bride-to-Be and a tiara do serve a good purpose when trying to enter a bar full of of people.

By the way, here's a photo from my ROM ceremony. Love my green shoes and gerbera bouquet A LOT!

Wedding Updates

It's another 3 months to the wedding and many people have ask me how is the preparation. There are plenty of things to do and plenty of things to buy and yet I have not done much preparation in the last few months. I have yet to shoot for the pre wedding photos, have not file for the ROM (now not even sure whether the date we wanted is available), have not chosen my gown yet, have not gotten our wedding band which I am almost certainly sure I will end up with a stainless steel ring for the rest of my life with DeGem or Love & Co only in my dreams :(, have not buy my wedding shoes and I am not even in the mood to hunt for one right now, have not gotten our bed and mattress, have not gotten the curtains because I don't know which colour to coordinate and match the room, have not gone for food tasting, have not printed or even finalise the wedding cards design, so many have nots till I lost count!

Sigh, just thinking of all these things already made me stress, depress and sad. Stress because I have to handle many things on my own. Depress because I could have gotten a better quality on some of these things if the budget for reno does not burst until it can not burst anymore. Sad because I can't even change my handphone although it almost certainly hanged each time someone calls me and because if I do change, I can't afford to buy him a ring. Even super sad because I won't have the luxury of having a shoe cabinet for my shoes.

LDR

It's Friday night and while everyone, or at least couples are out dating, here I am at home watching TV and typing this entry. Don't know why I feel so emotional the last few days but the past 1 year in a long distance relationship is not that easy. It takes a lot of courage to start one and even more courage and effort to maintain one. There were times when I wanted a cuddle or a hug, he is not there.  There were times, I wanted to call him just to hear his voice but it's already midnight over there. There were times when I need him the most and he was not around, just like the past 1 month where I had a major breakdown.  Sometimes, I just wish I have a normal relationship where I can just pick up the phone and call him or going out for movie and dinner dates anytime or celebrating our anniversaries, birthdays and valentines day together. I really envy those who can see their other half frequently as even with today's technology, skyping with him everyday is impossible due to timing difference. Even when he's back for holidays, the number of dates that we went out together and not 'sharing' with others are not even more than 10 times. Call me selfish or what, but I am just like every other girl out there who just want to spend as much time as possible with him without 'sharing' him with others.
Is it too much to ask?

Wish

I wish I can have a dog.

I wish I can decorate and manage my own home without interference.

I wish I can have my dream house where I don't need to travel 2 hours to work or wake up 6am in the morning to get to work.

I wish I can quit my job and do something I enjoy.

I wish I can go to Bora-Bora.

I wish I can backpack for Trans Siberia.

I wish I can cut my hair short.

I wish I can have a large wardrobe and shoe cabinet.

I wish that everyone stop dictating what and how they want me to be.

I wish I can be just who I am.

But, sadly these wishes just remain as wishes and will never come true...

Emotions

I no longer know how to laugh out loud,

I no longer know how to be optimistic,

I no longer know how to fight back,

I no longer know how to sleep without crying at night,

I no longer know who am I

Tired

Tired, feeling very tired for the past few months, both physically and mentally.

Passion

How many of us are lucky enough to actually love the job that we are doing? I used to love..maybe the love word is too strong, but I used to like my current job, at least I have the passion or the little fire burning inside. But all that had slowly disappear during the last few months and totally vanished after today. My passion for work has gone, zero, in fact has dipped below zero-negative. I cant recall how many times I had been upset over this, teared over this and finally it all gone today.

This is not exactly my choice of career. Maybe to some, a job is just to support the family, and to survive but to me, I need that passion in everything I do. I always wonder what if I had listened to my heart 10 years ago and chosen design over numbers crunching or what if I managed to get into medical school as I was a straight A student back then. I always wanted to be a heart surgeon and fly to those African countries and become a volunteer over there.

I no longer know what motivates me to work everyday, even money is not the motivation anymore. If I ever have my own children next time, I would definitely encourage them to follow their dreams even if he/she is a straight A student and wanted to study music.

So, what is my dream now? I do not know but someday, I hope I can follow my heart and pursue my passion to become a designer/artist/photographer.